CHRISTMAS FOOD

Merry Christmas all.  We have already had our Christmas Dinner as son number one works in the mining game FIFO.  So on alternate years he has to work Christmas Day, and this year is that year.  So we had it last weekend.

Now I only have myself to blame for this Christmas meal.  The choices were mine and I obviously got it wrong.

First the Turduckin.  Sounds amazing, a turkey, stuffed with a duck, stuffed with a chicken, stuffed with stuffing.  Yeah?  It comes in its own foil tray for cooking, and is wrapped in that heat resistent netting.  So far so good.  We followed the directions completely.  First mistake.

General tip, remove it from tray because you end up with a lump of meat simmering in liquid.  I would wrap it in foil if I ever had another one,  but have an escape hole for the liquid.  It never browned and looked really unappetising when I came to carve.

Now the carving.  Once you take the netting away, what is inside is lumps of meat of unidentifiable poultry (all except the turkey breast, which we did get to at one end) which just falls apart as you try to cut it.  What a disaster.

The only positive, it actually was tender and did taste good.  But would never, ever, ever buy another one.

Then there is the ham.  I have tried everything to find a ham that tastes like ham, or tastes of anything really.  I spent nearly $100 last year on a part leg from a fancy butcher, supposedly made by them - tasteless.  This year I bought a ham from a brand sprouting that it was free range, italian process, etc etc, tasteless.  I'd started to suspect the diet of stall raised pigs was the problem, obviously not.

So next year the decision is made, a pork roast (although pork also is lacking flavour these days) and possibly a chicken or something along those lines.

Our pud was great, home made, as were the veges and all else on the day.

I hope your meal is tastier than ours was and that everyone has a wonderful day

MELBOURNE AND BACK

Its been a few weeks since I blogged.  During that time we went to Melbourne on business and also caught up with our boys and their families while there.  Not much food reporting to do as we self catered on the first night in our apartment and then youngest son served up a delicious barbeque and middle son took us for pizza - all of which was great.  We are learning to be cautious while travelling because tasty edible food is hard to come by on the road and the old local bakery isn't that exciting in most towns.  Having said  that there is a good one in Tailem Bend - you have to deviate off the main highway but a decent coffee and lovely cake is to be had.

Summer is ice cream time in our house and I've just started the first batch for this year.  I have some ripe to nearly overripe nectarines so have just put a mixture in to chill before churning, to make nectarine ice cream (peaches can also be used).  I also have some apricots so will be making roasted apricot ice cream with those.  Favourite is salted caramel, a good quality vanilla ice cream with caramel sauce swirled through it.

It is also nearly Christmas, so the puddings were made yesterday.

Every Monday I meet a group of friends and we lunch at cafes around the Mitcham/Clarence Park area.  The problem is that there is very little choice on the menus, and its very much the same old, same old.  You can get a quiche of some sort (usually roasted veges because they can't think past that), a sandwich or roll up that is always full of stuff you wish wasn't in there or a squashed toasted sandwich.   Fresh bread, a filling like ham or tuna and fresh salad would be lovely, but no we get smashed avocado (not mashed, smashed), chili sauce, aioli, bacon, cheese etc etc, all on one sandwich.  Most cafe owners are just plain lazy.

Thank heavens for a little coffee shop in Stirling that is owned by a couple, one of whom hails from Seattle - much more imaginative choices there, including some delicious american style sandwiches like the hot philly cheese steak sandwich with caramelised onions - YUM.

CUP CAKES

I know I said not until next week but last night we went to the local food market in the city and wandering around before we decided on a coffee.  They had a fabulous array of the most gorgeous cup cakes, with amazing frosting and decorations.  I couldn't resist, had to have one.

Chose a chocolate cup cake with a mountain of frosting and caramel on top, gooey caramel.

Let me say that the frosting was delicious, but the caramel was something out of a tin I think, flavourless.  But worse was to come.  The cake was stale, at least a week old if not more.  The crumb was actually hard. It was as bad as the canoli I once had that was so stale the tube was soft and the custard would have bounced if I'd dropped it.   Why oh why do cafes think this is OK?

We live in a world with enormous choice when you are looking for a meal, simple or complicated.

Why is it then that so many places get it so wrong?  Or maybe I'm just fussy.

On this blog I am going to track the things that I have found both here and overseas and how it just doesn't seem right.

The first one is from Texas.  Having enjoyed a meal my spouse decided he wanted dessert.  His eye was taken by a chocolate concoction with an elaborate chocolate sculpture on top.  Two or three minutes after taking a bite of said chocolate he is looking at me with a look that clearly said HELP!  The chocolate was indigestible, he had a lump in his mouth that wouldn't break down (felt like plasticine to him) and was trying desperately to work out how to be polite and eject it from his mouth.  Why would you make anything out of this stuff and then put it on something that is clearly meant to be eaten?

My most recent food mishap is from a recent trip to another capital city in Australia.  On two different occasions I ordered a chicken salad sandwich for lunch.  Innocent enough, two slices of bread, chicken, lettuce, tomato, cheese and maybe mayo.   Right? Wrong!  Both times it was delivered to me toasted - I didn't want it toasted, no where on the menu did it mention toasting, so why did it get toasted??  Now that wouldn't be so bad I suppose if you take out the lettuce and mayo.  Lettuce when heated turns to slime, and mayo disintegrates into a runny oily mess.  Needless to say neither sandwich got eaten.  They weren't edible.

In the UK my challenge was to find drinkable coffee.  For a cappuccino they use the same shot of coffee as we do here in Australia, then they put it in a cup so big you would usually serve it with soup in it, and add half a bucket of hot milk.  Even a triple shot didn't solve this one.

I leave you with this rant for the day, will add more next week because I'm off interstate again and there are bound to be some more disasters.